Cookin' & Cussin'

Fancy Football Franks

Yup, I’m doing it again. Last week was a Super Bowl push for the perfect appetizer – Buffalo Jalapeño Poppers so I figured this week would be the REAL push for the other favorite appetizer – lil pigs in a blanket! Or as I like to call them : Fancy Football Franks.

The name Frank itself does not sound fancy. It sounds like an older gentleman who is grumpy, annoyed at his wife, & full of gas. Frank does not deserve this thought. Frank can be Fancy. I made it as such.

the tastiest lil guys

My husband loves pigs in a blanket – shit, I do too but it’s the same debacle as what I talked about in my previous recipe & blog post – if ANYTHING is wrapped up in a damn crescent roll, while it is delicious, it is toooo filling.

To further my opinion & belief that Franks can be Fancy, I was at my company’s awards & banquet a few weeks ago and guess what they were passing around during our cocktail hour?? THAT’S RIGHT – lil pigs in a blanket! SUPER FANCY. I loved it! The version I was happy to munch on had “Everything But The Bagel Seasoning” sprinkled on each one. So nothing that blew me out of the park, but they were damn delicious.

puff the magic pastry

When I’m at a Super Bowl party, I want to be able to graze. Make a plate with 1 of everything to try & enjoy and then still be able to go back for more later. Don’t get me wrong, I love carbs, but sometimes they are far too much & far too big – I’m lookin’ at you, Crescent Rolls.

So, I remembered that Puff Pastry exists. Sure, its daunting to work with & kind of a bear, but it’s also worth it! I like that I can cut lil strips of it ((easiest while semi-frozen)) and it works perfectly wrapped around Lil Smokies!

Puff Pastry truly is ideal because it puffs up beautifully & the bite is like air with a slight crunch – I can’t fully describe it ((or correctly)) so you’ll just have to run out to the store to snag all the necessary ingredients to make this finger-favorite treat yoself!

I’m sure you’re asking “Goddess Megan, what makes your Lil Smokies wrapped with Puff Pastry *Fancy* ?” Never fear, that is a good question & don’t worry, I’m about to deliver!

the secret ingredient

Caramelized Onions with Balsamic Vinegar & Fig Jam – *Chefs Kiss*

It truly is a work of art.

Lusciously soft & buttery caramelized onions with that zing of balsamic & sweet, sticky fig jam to round it all out – rolled up in pillowy heaven WITH a lil FRANK in the middle of all of that?!

The name Frank sounds way more appealing now, right? Well if your mouth isn’t watering by now then I guess I got nothin’ for ya but I seriously doubt that….I’ll even bet grumpy ‘ol Frank is excited by now so let’s get to it!

Ingredients

· 1 medium sweet Vidalia onion, sliced thin

· 2 TBS Balsamic Vinegar

· ½ TSP garlic powder

· 2 TBS Fig Jam

· 2 TBS salted butter

· 1 package Puff Pastry, semi-frozen ((stick it in the freezer for 30-45 minutes))

· 1 package Lil Smokies cocktail weenies

· 1 egg

Instructions, 1

Firstly, slice your onion nice & thin to get the caramelization going since that’s going to take the better part of 15 minutes.

Heat a pan over medium heat, melt the butter and drop in all the thinly sliced onions.

Season the onions with garlic powder and S+P.

Stirring occasionally, allow the onions to sweat down until they are completely translucent, soft & browned – about 15 minutes.

Turn the heat down to low & pour in the balsamic vinegar & stir, allowing the hot pan to help the onions absorb the liquid.

After a couple of minutes, transfer your onions to a bowl that is heat-safe and add in the fig jam – stir well to combine.

The fig jam will make the onions sticky & perfect to place on your puff pastry & help the weenies stick and stay in place!

Read the instructions on your puff pastry packaging & preheat the oven to whatever temperature it says.

On a large baking sheet, place parchment paper & have all your ingredients at the ready.

Roll out 1 “fold” of puff pastry – because it is semi-frozen, it should be more solid & easier to work with.

With a super-sharp knife or a pizza cutter ((that’s what I use & its superior)) cut about ½ inch wide strips on the bias.

I usually can get 7-9 pieces per row of puff pastry.

Using a spoon, scoop your onion-balsamic-fig jam mixture and gently spread out about ½ TSP on each piece of puff pastry.

Lay 1 weenie per puff pastry & roll gently to cover.

Instructions, 2

Since this puff pastry is on the bias, it will be prettier so your weenie will stick out on either end – that is fine & that is what we want.

Lay each blanketed weenie seam-side down on the parchment paper baking sheet.

Give a couple inches of space between them – puff pastry won’t spread like a cookie but it will puff up & you want each weenie to have space to be golden brown in all its glory.

Repeat the steps until ALLLLL weenies have been used – you’ll probably run out of weenies before you run out of puff pastry, just FYI.

In a small bowl, break your 1 egg & add a couple TSP of water.

Whisk with a fork & have a silicone brush at the ready.

Gently & quickly brush over each puff pastry ensconced weenie with your egg wash mixture.

Don’t DOUSE it, just give it a lil brushy-brush so it will shine & be golden brown when it comes out of the oven – insanely important.

Bake your weenies at the instructions the puff pastry package provides – also be sure to peek in and make sure nothing is going awry & nothing is on fire.

The weenies are already fully cooked so this step is simply for the puff pastry.

Serve on your favorite football platter. I personally didn’t think my Fancy Football Franks needed a dipping sauce since the onion-balsamic-fig jam mixture lends such a delicious flavor, but do you, boo.

Happy Super Bowl LVII and enjoy your delicious spread! Hope my weenies made the cut!

Fancy (Frank) but here to Party (Super)

IDK about y’all but I come to Super Bowl parties for the food. And when I say “come” I mean host, because Chris & I have hosted the Super Bowl every year for the nearly 10 years we’ve been together – shit is wild.

I’m also a Dallas fan & he’s a Commanders fan so we all know neither one of our teams is gonna make an appearance at the Super Bowl any time soon – not being nasty, but just sayin’.

SO THE FOOD. Come for the entertainment ((commercials)) and stay for the food ((Fancy Football Franks)) I’d like to think my lil cocktail weenies are in some sort of a tux – maybe a white tux ((puff pastry)) with a black shirt? ((onion-balsamic-fig jam mixture))

I realize I’ve gone too far. I’ve made it too weird. Oh well. If you know me by now, its bound to happen. This recipe was thought up on a whim because my husband had requested Mini Pigs in a Blanket so I was like yea sure – but also let me make it something FuN for the blog! ((narrator : Chris did not like that))

IDK what the hell he thought I’d come up with but he was kinda against it the whole way – eyerolllllll but then of course he wanted to “taste my work” and said they were pretty dang good – TOLD YA. Menz. I swear.

So anyway, this mixture is V similar to my Stuffed Pork Tenderloin recipe that’s in the archives – also divine. I’m not sure what it is about Pork & Figs – its almost as good as Pork & Apples / Applesauce but it lends a darker fruit & a more savory element when paired with the weenies. Basically, it just works!

Give this a try yourself this Super Bowl weekend! If your spouse / crowd is less than thrilled about the idea of the something competing with their cocktail weenie, cut the recipe in half & do a head-to-head competition! Or not, geez just trying to have some fun.

Whatever I need to find some form of fun for this Super Bowl cause I don’t give 2 shits about the Eagles or Mahomes, the end.